Stumped

We had this thing a few days ago and I surprised myself by actually being there. I never liked being in situations where people would talk about their qualifications, professional experiences, educational pedigree and such. Maybe this is because this is not my ideal field to begin with. Or maybe because I wish I had something more to say.

It was awkward to say the least. I was unprepared, but ultimately, it was a good decision to be there. I needed the change in environment. And it was fun! I met some interesting people and actually skipped the usual topics. I have to admit that I woke up the next day thinking, wait..just how awkward was I last night?

It did make me think if it was another wake up call. Why am I still doing this? Well, for the money of course. And for the balance. I don’t want to keep on talking about the second best. The back-up plan. The whole my-original-dream-won’t-work-so-this-is-what-I’ll-go-after-instead thing. How I hate to be at this again. Knowing what I want is easy but the getting-there part is the hardest.

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